What if I don’t “like” you?

Something has been gnawing at me.  It’s taking up my thoughts, and thus my time.  And it’s irritating. It’s making me angry. The whole cycle. Its making me angry. My time, which is valuable, is being spent on the following.

It’s Facebook. It’s Twitter. It’s Gmail.  It’s not them. It’s my decision to partake of the daily bread that is the salvation of socialization. The addiction, and the pull to keep up, click that, like him, support her, join them, block him and it goes on. That bright red notification bubble pops up and we feed off of it. We crave it. We close the laptop to step away only to be pulled back in moments later like Pavlov’s dogs looking for a meaty morsel, or in our case, attention.

I think that’s what it really boils down to. We are looking for some thing to break down the walls of our isolation of our far too busy lives. We have to. Its not an option. We are required in today’s society to meld to the mold of (deep breath) fast-paced-get-everything-done-and-if-you-fall-behind-our-expectations-that-are-now-your-expectations-because-it-is-instilled-that-this-is-the-only-acceptable-way-to-live, then…..you fail. This failing to not get the likes, push the buttons and open the PM’s leads you to loneliness, this leads to diminished confidence, this leads to bad self image, this leads to depression. Do you see what I’m getting at here?

As a stay at home mom I guess I’m talking to me. There are a lot of “me”s out there. This is how we fill the void. This void is decreased adult interaction.  It happens to us all after we have a kiddo or two…especially three. We hole up in the cave and we feel obligated to remain as thus until we are allotted the freedom that Kindergarten offers. Time. Free time. So in the mean time till then we are here. Right where you are. Staring at a smart phone, a tablet, a laptop screen or a monitor. We log on meet and have coffee every morning, we laugh at each other’s well thought out witty snarky clever status updates jokes and create plan pages playgroups and we push ask each other to share invite others to come and like join the fun. But there is something missing. Everyone wants me to like them. I should be satisfied. Are you satisfied? Is not that what friendship is? The request to like and the like in return? I don’t know. It’s starting to feel superficial. The once gratifying tracking of hits to my Facebook group pages is now spiraling down to a feeling of desperate need of real human interaction. It is so much easier to hole up in the cave. I know it is. Especially since…ahem…winter is coming…(sorry, I’m having GOT withdrawals). It takes so much effort to get going. So I sit back. I sit by my pellet stove and Facebook my day away while I nurse, while I throw snack on the table for my toddler, while I forget to change the laundry….again. Is this what I want? Is this what you want?

I have been thinking about all this for a couple of weeks with the intensity of my feelings rising each day. Then as if manifest from thin air came this video on my Facebook feed….of course, where else? I feel more justified in my emotional Facebook rant.

Will I still sit by every morning with my coffee and chat it up with friends and “like” everything they ask me to while they do the same for me? Yeah, it’s likely that I’ll keep it going. Hell, just in the interim of writing this blog post I’ve check my Facebook pages 4 times. Plus it makes my “friends” feel good, too. And if having 40 “likes” by tomorrow gets them through another day feeling happy and if 4 of my other friends comment on a photo I post and that gets me through another day feeling happy, then why not? I just hope this is not the beginning of something much bigger that we can never stop.

What happens if we forget how to hold a real unadulterated conversation? What if we stopped clicking like and started picking up the phone and really met up with half of the people we interacted with on Facebook. I don’t know that this is possible since I have three hundred and one “friends”…..but what if.

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1 Comment

  1. Pingback: Sunday Confession: Social Media | Flaws and All

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